Good morning guys. I trust your weekend has been a bliss and that you’re looking forward to an even better second week of September. Well, I am. Now what I’m about to share today apparently is a real story. Someone shared it with me and asked me to write about it. I however did not know how to judge the situation as it has been more than two weeks, since I was told about it. Let’s hope we can say something and come to an agreement at the end.
In a certain village, there lived a man who was married to his wife. I do not know much about the man, but I know the wife was devout. In Kikuyu we love to call such a woman, “Mutumia Ngatha”. I believe she is the woman that Proverbs 31 talks about. The woman was the kind who was constantly on her knees. If you asked me, the very strength she had on her knees that she would constantly lift up her husband and her home in prayer, was the same strength that kept the family together.
It was until later that her husband decided to marry a second wife. There is not much to say about the second wife, but she was not as devout as the first. Not much is known about her background and Christianity and so we will not judge the situation. In most cases, when a man decides to go for a second wife, the first is still there but often abandoned. She watches while the new baby is pampered and she wallows in sadness but without a say.
Wife number one continued to pray. She knew her wifely duty was not only to cook and to feed her husband, Her main duty was to keep her family together in prayer. Here is how I didn’t want to judge the situation but a few questions of course did go through my mind.
- Why would the husband go for wife number 2?
It is a difficult situation to judge but we will often find that something must have triggered the fact that this man did so. However, to have identified his wife and promised to love her till death do them part, is a promise he did not get to fulfill. When a person is not filled with Jesus in his heart, he will often lose sight of the love he first identified. He is able to only see with the physical eyes while the spiritual are asleep.
- Were the first wife’s prayers not good enough?
They say, prayer changes things. I do not even know whether there came a time that the man let go of the second wife he had brought home. But i know that the first wife was constantly in prayer for her husband and for her home. Could we honestly say that the wife’s prayers often went unheard? No. The thing is that some things we do are still part of God’s plan and the first wife needed to trust the process. It is never easy before the answer comes by but we can stand in the hope that the wife’s tears eventually were wiped away.
- Was the husband committing sin?
But who am I to judge. Some of us may decide to look at the lives of men of God in the Bible and especially the Old Testament and say, they would often marry two or more. But Jesus came and made everything new. Today we stand on the fact that a man shall leave his family, his father and his mother. He shall be be joined with his wife and they shall become one. So was the husband committing sin?
When we think at this whole scenario, it is difficult to understand. As a human being, it is not in my position to judge the husband or the second wife he got to bring home. I can say one thing however. That there is so much to the process that leads us to marriage. That is where we need to invite the presence of Jesus in our relationships, so that we can endure the challenges of marriage rather than escape to find answers.
You may be in a relationship that is currently on the rocks and the option is to end it. At the beginning, you may have wanted to marry or get married to. What changes? These monsters we begin to see. What brings them about?
The reason why most times relationships and marriages are failing and leading us to alternative options is because we are dissatisfied and either looking for perfection. That should not be the case. We meet people in their scars from the past and wounds that are still healing and lessons he or she is still learning. If you are not patient in that, in a relationship you will quit and in a marriage, you will look for an alternative. That is why love is patient, and it is kind.
I would say that the first wife really wanted to save the marriage. To keep the husband and have a foundation based on Jesus for the entire home.
I pray today that the Anchor shall steer our relationships. That He shall give us patience and endurance so that we can victoriously get through the challenges of marriage and fulfill the vows we boldly utter before God and all the witnesses.
God bless you for reading. I would so much love to hear from you, and I would appreciate if you shared this widely.
From my heart to yours. 🙂